It took until I was twenty-three, a second chance and the epiphany that life was never meant to be lived in a metaphorical box for me to decide that travel was the only logical path I could take to open myself up to the world.

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It began when I was twenty years old. Like many people my age, I was attending university. I was struggling a bit, not really finding my place. I didn’t know what I wanted to major in, I couldn’t keep my focus on any particular subject and, for the absolute bloody life of me, I couldn’t picture what my life would be like post-academia. Not ten years, not five years. Not even a year. You know, when you ‘grow up’, pursue your career, achieve the goals you’re meant to set when you’ve graduated high school. To keep a long story short, I eventually left school. Though I loved the ‘university’ style of being taught to think outside of the box, the classroom setting proved not to be where I could really learn valuable lessons that would teach me where my potential for a happy, balanced self would be achievable. I suffered from severe anxiety.

Age twenty-two – Upon moving home with feelings of utter defeat, a quiet voice within reminded me of my childhood dreams of seeing the world. Was I actually capable of this? Could I be one of ‘those’ people who could live out their visions fearlessly and ambitiously? Well..perhaps not fearlessly, but I decided to plan for it anyway. A working holiday. After about a year of saving every penny I earned, I had to stop myself again. What on EARTH was I doing? I could NOT do this! I had enough anxiety to hardly be comfortable in many social situations, let alone bring myself completely outside of my comfort zone and learn how to meet new people again.

Let me tell you, it took a lot of self-analysis and soul-searching before I decided to take on the challenge and think of it as something of a form of self-therapy and emotional experimentation. I didn’t have a single thing to lose. My first stop was London, UK. My second would be Helsinki, Finland – a city I had dreamt of visiting after falling in love with their music scene and their history/culture. Yeah, that’s right! I booked myself to fly to a country where English wasn’t a native language. In my panicked state,  among a thousand other worries, I wondered if anyone would understand me. Well..it definitely didn’t take me long to learn that most people in urban areas speak English perfectly well. People were overwhelmingly welcoming and friendly. I was inspired. I’m not exactly sure what it was about it, but a visit to this cold country warmed my heart. I would come back again.

My ultimate destination was Edinburgh, where I’d find work. Many travels, laughs and wonderful spontaneous friends later, I’ve become rather learned in social culture, history and language. I’ve met some incredibly awesome people, too. I’ve broken myself out of the mould, done something completely different and inspired myself to open myself up to every new experience possible. I’m happy to say that my anxiety is at a normal level and I’ve learned to control it – this would never have happened if I hadn’t taken that monumental step for myself to ‘break out’.

To sum it all up, I’d like to hope this will have inspired even a single reader who might even slightly doubt their ability to travel. It’s the best education I’ve ever received in my life thus far, it’s helped me break through many an emotional barrier and it’s something that inspires and motivates me to continue doing something new every day without a second thought. It may sound cliché, but folks, when someone says that life’s short – it really is. We’ve got one go at this and we should never hold back our dreams for ourselves.

Roll on New Zealand, I’m ready for ya!

-A.